Becca Stareyes

Not quite a rant, but more a frustration I'm trying to work out.

Dad just emailed me to invite me to spend Christmas and his birthday in Florida with him and Marjorie, my stepmother. Normally I spend Christmas in Nebraska -- Dad lives there, Mom lives there, neither of my siblings have moved out of state, and I still have friends in Lincoln. But Dad and Marjorie have taken to spending winter break in Florida for the weather. Dad apparently thought I did things closer to how we did things as kids -- I'd spend Thanksgiving with one parent, and Christmas with the other, so he offered to pay for my plane ticket down to Florida, assuming I'd see Mom next month.

Well, except I don't feel like flying across the country for a long weekend, so I normally take a bus to Boston and visit my extended family there for the Thanksgiving holidays. So, if I take Dad up on his offer, I save some money, get to see him for Christmas, and get to spend Christmas on the beach. On the other hand, I won't see Mom or my friends -- and probably Jenn and Matt, since my sister both has to deal with spending time with Matt's family and if given a choice between Mom and Dad, will choose Mom. (I don't know about Ben -- he doesn't like having his routine disrupted*, but he also does like seeing Dad, though, unlike me, he sees Dad regularly.)

* And Christmas morning at Mom's is traditional -- normally either we go over Dad's the night before, or for Christmas dinner. Or, more recently, a later weekend.

The only compromise I can come up with is to visit Dad for a week or so for Christmas, and then maybe take a week off for my birthday to visit Nebraska.

I'm starting to discover the causes of my occasional insomnia. Basically a mix of anxiety* and irregular sleep patterns. Two nights ago, it was anxiety. Last night, irregular sleeping -- I fell asleep after dinner, so it took me over an hour to fall asleep for the night. Both of these should be correctable with effort.

Also, I think I'm turning into my mother, in that displacing myself to the living room to sleep for a couple of hours, only to wander back to the bedroom, seems to help.

* Usually compounded if I forget to take my meds.

Also, someone needs to tell my father that he's allowed to email me for reasons other than shameless self-promotion. I sent him an email when my computer broke about that, and trying to chat, but most of the emails he sends me are links about him making the news.

Today, he was mentioned in a NYT article about a bombing suspect. Dad studies a chemical that's commonly manufactured as a bathtub explosive. Mostly because it's the type of thing you can make with stuff from the drugstore, and is terribly nasty -- it was the explosive used in the 2005 London bombings. Which means he gets occasional news mentions as an Expert, and the occasional local piece as Chemist Fights Terrorists with Science~!

You know, it's funny, but I can be incredibly inspired by what I think are other people's bad ideas. Sometimes to rant, other times to get my own. Shame it doesn't extend to writing things. I have a lot of worldbuilding ideas, but never do anything with them plot-wise. I think it's a bit intimidating to find a story in them.

( Read more... )

Mom and Ben are going to be moving about a month from now to an apartment building on Vine Street. I can picture where it is -- not that far from where we used to live, and the sort of thing we'd drive by a lot if we were heading to the university from our house.

I also saw that my uncle Donny posted a picture to Facebook of Grandma's cottage up for sale. Grandma owned property on the New Hampshire coast, and left it to her kids when she died. Problem was, Mom and Uncle Rick were too far away to use it much, Uncle Donny had a place up there already, and Maryjean and Uncle Jay and Uncle Bobby* didn't feel/couldn't afford to buy out their siblings -- or at least field the property taxes and utilities. Not to mention that when Grandma was alive, Uncle Donny was usually the maintenance guy, with occasional help from my cousins Declan and Dylan when they were teenagers. Not quite fair for Uncle Donny to maintain two places up there, one he doesn't even own (different when it's for his elderly mother, I mean). So, they finally got their act together and are going to sell it and split the money six ways. It's a couple of blocks from the beach, but it's also the sort of place that's decades old and needs some major repair work, and is also small**, so most likely it'll be torn down to build a bigger beach house.

It's just weird, you know, thinking that things will be different than they've always been.

* Yes, my mother had five brothers and sisters. My dad has four. Insert your favorite joke about Catholics here.
** I think it's a good size for a family beach house, and we've slept ten people in it for family reunions. (More if Maryjean brings her tent and sleeps in the backyard.)

Mom warned me about this when I saw her over the summer, but she's selling the house now that Ben's out of school. Basically on her income, she can't afford the mortgage without help from the child support she gets from Dad. Since my brother is going to be 19 in October, there goes that income.

Mom emailed me this week to tell me the house sold, and they'll be moving soon to an apartment somewhere. Mom figures she'll have to rent storage until she can pare a house's worth of crap down to an apartment's worth.

(Also, she's kind of upset that this means she can't do her awesome Halloween yard displays. If anyone is in the Lincoln area and wants someone to turn their front yard into a haunted house for a month, and doesn't mind helping by getting up on a ladder*, she'd be happy to help. Our neighbor/Mom's best friend** offered, but Mom said that they have different tastes -- Mom likes 'creepy' and Peg likes 'funny'. I know only a few of you live in Lincoln, and many still live with family, but hey...)

It's kind of weird. We moved to that house when I was 11 or so, back when my parents were still together. Dad built the swingset in the backyard -- which Mom donated to the day care next door when we got too old for it -- and tried to start a rock garden in the side yard which languished once he moved out, and eventually had to be re-lanscaped when the terracing collapsed. It was my first room on my own -- I had to share with Jenn when we were kids -- and I stuck glow-in-the-dark stars on the ceiling and covered the walls with posters and maps from National Geographic. I remember the tree in the front yard falling during a windstorm, and planting an oak tree I got for Arbor Day that may or may not still be there.

Things were already changing once I moved out here. A year or two after I left, Mom redid my room into a guest room -- she took down the posters (but kept the glow-in-the-dark stars) and moved things around. It was a shock. She also redid the office -- which was originally a spot Dad set up to work on stuff, and became our computer/junk room once he left -- into a tiny dining room, and moved the computer into Jenn's bedroom.

But, still... it's weird to think that the next time I come back (for Christmas), I'll be coming to a two-bedroom apartment where I'll have to sleep on the couch rather than the house I grew up with and my old bedroom.

* Mom is afraid of heights, so one of us kids would usually handle things.

** /the computer teacher (and Patron Saint of geeky high school students) at my old high school/Mom's coworker's wife. In summary, our family's tight with hers. She even has an open invitation to visit Mom's brothers and sisters, and Mom was friends with her family.

So, I got my yearly dose of beach, card games* and family gossip/drama at the Mom'sFamily family reunion. Have to add 'baby afghan' on the To Do List, as my cousin found out she was pregnant -- she's trying to keep it off Facebook, though, but everyone knew, so I don't know how long that will last. (Thankfully, the baby isn't due until after the holidays.)

* The family is a big believer in card games. Plus we had my aunt's step-grandson visiting for the week, and he was constantly in need of being entertained.

( Let's talk about the trip back.  )

I'm working my way through hundreds of LJ posts -- the smart thing to do would be to put together a reading list of friends, then just skim for community announcements, but I didn't do that. So, I'm skipping the hundreds of bad_rpers_suck, fanficrants, and drabble posts on writing communities to get to the meat of things. I have a feeling I'm not going to make it into work, as it's lunchtime and I'm still fuzzy, so I better let my boss know that travel fatigue has me skipping a meeting where I'll just be listening to the rest of the group.

Went to the department barbecue, where the traditional dish is butter-soaked potatoes and half-chickens grilled over a firepit. Seriously -- they have these metal grates with handles that are like, 2' x 3', and there's like five of them loaded up with chicken halves and they grill for five hours covered in marinade. And they are delicious and filling -- I ate at 3 PM, and am not especially hungry now. Of course, it might have also been the salad, couscous, and desserts (Laura brought chocolate-chip cheesecake to the picnic!).

( My life, so stressful. )

In something less stress-inducing, I did some Slayers fanart!

Made it home, but late, so I decided to take off the morning so I could sleep in. Next time, I do not fly on Wednesday -- I have group meetings on Thursday, and I hate going into work the day after I return from a trip, when I really need to do things like get food other than pasta/rice and unpack. (I do like flying midweek, as the planes going into and out of Ithaca are nearly empty -- there were maybe 8 people on the last flight.)

I made it home, but I did have a couple of mishaps -- thunderstorms delayed my last flight and my DS has apparently vanished into the aether. -_- (I was doing so well in Rune Factory, too -_-)

( The trip itself was fine... )

All of you in Nebraska, I might be dropping in for a week. See my little brother is graduating high school*, and I want to attend the ceremony. So that means flying to Lincoln during the first week of June and leaving a week later.

* Well, he's going to be in the ceremony. Since he's Special Ed**, he can stay in high school until age 21, and get his classes paid for by the government. Mom is debating whether next year should be a 'transition year' between East HS and the community college, or if he should go to SCC full-time. It depends a lot on what East can offer him in classes when he's not at college, and how much time needs to be spent in getting him used to college. I know Dad wants him in a four-year school, but sometimes I think my father thinks anyone who does not end up with a graduate degree in something (and humanities don't count) is a failure at life.

** For new folks, Ben is high-functioning autistic. He's mainstreamed in school, though. Main concern is that college will mean that he's got fewer people looking out for him directly.

So, I spent my new year in the traditional manner -- I played video games and trivia with Sara on the Eve, and then got up late and watched football with Mom.

(Go Big Red! It was a good bowl game for Nebraska, with the team rallying in the second half to win the game. Less good that a lot of the points Clemson did score came from fumbles & interceptions.)

Anyway, I'm trying to think of Resolutions. I'm thinking that I should try to write every day* and I'd like to get in shape.

* Within reason. If I get the horrendous stomach flu I had last November, I'm gonna spend the day in bed with the largest ambition being to keep food in my stomach.

I just finished the afghan I made for my sister - I didn't know if I'd get it done before the holidays (my goal was 'I'm not hauling the thing back to Ithaca, so it'll be done or left by the 4th'.) Anyway, it's wrapped beneath the tree.

Everything else is wrapped, with bows and stuff on it. Ben and I just got done watching The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, in between flipping to check the score on the Notre Dame vs Hawai'i game. (After the first quarter it wasn't that good -- and watch me eat my words since I didn't see the final quarter at all.)

I've been sneaking cookies all day (okay, two cookies), and there are pies on the counter. There's a blanket of snow on the ground, and I'm tired enough I'm going to drop off to sleep soon. Sadly the mad dash to finish the afghan meant that I didn't get to read Hogfather again like I planned. Oh, well...

Happy holidays to everyone.

So, I figured out why I didn't log onto the 'net at night. The insulation in the spare room's window stinks. My fingers are freezing here.

Christmas at Dad's was all right. Sadly both Dad and I had outstanding gifts towards one another -- the coffee mug I ordered got there the day after, and Dad said one of the books he got me was lost in Outer Mongolia or whatever. Anyway, I ended up with books and games, and Mom found out from Ben later that he Really Really Wants Chrono Trigger. (I got to explain to Ben why Chrono Trigger DS was not on the Best Game of 2008 -- mostly because the original is on the Best Game of the SNES Era list)

Yes, I'm playing Chrono Trigger now. I'm already on the way to get Frog back in my party. Also trying to do it without the walkthroughs, unless I get stuck.

Also reading -- I got three books by Charles Stross, and have read two. (See this is why I only brought four books with me on the plane.)

I don't know what else to say, besides that my hands are cold, and it's spreading to my toes and nose and I want to stop typing because of it. Oh, yeah, turned in my Yuletide story.

So, I made it to Nebraska, safe and sound. Despite iffy weather the whole way out, losing my scarf somewhere between Ithaca and Chicago, and a flight crew that was an hour late getting into Chicago, causing us to be an hour late to Omaha. Jenn picked me up since she works in Omaha, and drove me back to town.

Jenn showed me 84th street as we drove into town, which is a lot more built up than I remember. That and the bus system has gotten worse. I didn't think this was possible, but I guess cutting out half of the routes does that.

Mom also got high-speed internet, which means I can now go online without tying up the phone line. I'm supposed to help her set up wireless as well, which means I can use my laptop online. (She also got a spiffy used Mac from my uncle Donny, which should let me work remotely over break.)

I'm hoping my dad's present gets here safe and sound within the next two hours. It arrived in Omaha, and is supposed to be out for delivery, but I haven't seen it yet. We're going over to Dad and Marjorie's to celebrate the holidays, since they are heading down to Florida for winter break. (Marjorie has a 'thing' about winters, and only stays in the northern half of the country for them since that's where her paychecks come from, and finding somewhere in the South that will take two chemists would be not fun.)

I should be online sporadically over break, and certainly in e-mail contact. Friday, we're decorating the tree with Jenn and Matt, and we're supposed to do the big Christmas thing at lunch on the 25th, so Jenn can visit Matt's parents for their dinner as well. (Jenn trying to negotiate with her in-laws is a family tradition -- Matt's mom doesn't seem used to the idea that Matt's in-laws would like to see the happy couple too, and Matt has extended family in town and we don't, which complicates things.)

I sent out cards on Monday, so I hope everyone gets them who wanted one. If not, I can try to make up a pretty e-card for you all.

So, feeling much better. Enough to go to work, though I might end up setting up shop in the cafe instead of going into my office before noon. (What?) We also had our first 'snowfall' of the year, or at least the first one that has stayed on the ground. It is truly a winter wonderland.

For you music geeks, Cornell put up the concert the orchestra (plus IC's orchestra) did of "The Planets", with the visuals folks at the Astronomy department did. (I helped with Saturn, though Matt H. did most of the work!). I'd be interested to see what you guys thought of it. The link is here though I can't get the plugin to work, and had to use the 'download video' link. Since it's a camera and not the original movie files, the quality is a bit lower, but it's still pretty awesome. Also, kudos to the orchestra. Sadly, this doesn't include the original piece that a local composer wrote for Cassini's Saturn (called "Anillos" -- rings), but I guess he might not want the first recording of it available for free over the internet. Holst's work has been in the public domain for a while now, so it's not like most people will care that a university orchestra is playing this.

(Also there are some planets that can be real pains in the butt to find pictures off. Mercury's was assembled before a lot of MESSENGER data came down, and includes a lot of Sun footage. Uranus and Neptune also are pains in the neck.)

Also, since Holst was more into astrology than astronomy, and wrote the piece before Pluto was a speck on Clyde Tombaugh's photographic plates, it's seven pieces (Mercury, Venus, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus and Neptune).

Also, I made my Thanksgiving plans. I'll be in the Boston area from Tuesday around noon until Friday (though most of Friday-in-Boston will be spent waking up and getting on the bus to Logan Airport). Also set my Christmas plans -- Lincoln, Nebraska from 16 December to 5 January. My sister works in Omaha now, so it makes flying a bit cheaper if I can arrive and depart sometime close to when she works -- Mom refuses to use the Omaha airport if possible, since the interstate around Omaha is possibly the most confusing thing known to mankind, and she can't drive well after dark/before dawn. (There's a part in Good Omens where the demon Crowley notes that he made sure a certain part of the British highway system was built in the shape of a satanic symbol to generate increased ire from drivers. Yeah.)

Just spoke to two people from Cornell Housing (I think...). Apparently they were looking for a grad student who had been sleeping in the stairwell that leads to the roof, and wanted to speak to him and make sure he had somewhere to live and was generally okay. Since one of my officemates keeps weird hours (read: there was a time I had stayed around here until 2 AM playing Axis and Allies, and he was still in the office working when I left), they wanted to make sure it wasn't him.

( How was my weekend? )

Well, back to work. These papers won't read themselves.

My weekend went well, if you ignore the fact I went way over budget on groceries (I was filling out my spice rack again, and buying some food for the end-of-year barbecue) and slept a bit too much.

My surge protector also blew out -- I think. I noticed that my computer wasn't starting up on Sunday morning*, but everything else seemed to be working. I started to fiddle with the surge protector, when I noticed the power button was lit, but the switch wasn't. I pushed at it, and then the switch fell out, with a spark. Needless to say, I quickly unplugged it and high-tailed it to Best Buy and got a new one. The computer was fine, once I got it plugged in again. I also got some new dishes to replace the bowls and plates I've broken, and a slow-cooker. Yay, more culinary adventures!

* Well, for loose definitions of morning.

I've also been working on a present for my cousin Dylan's baby-to-be (so my first cousin, once removed) -- he and his fiancée are expecting this summer, and are also getting married. Well, technically they are marrying civily, but my cousin doesn't believe in marriage as a religious institution or something, so it's just a civil marriage plus a party. Or something -- he used an unfamiliar term for it. Anyway, the shower is in three weeks, and I'm hoping to have things finished by then. Which means I'm crocheting like a mad woman. I'll post pictures when I'm done.

Never realized that first cousin once removed refers to both my parents' cousins and my cousins' offspring. Probably because I'm not used to thinking of my cousins as having kids, despite the fact that this will be the fifth*.

* I have nine first cousins on that side of the family. I'm the fifth oldest of twelve kids in that generation. And that's ignoring my second cousins. We're a clan.

I just found out from my mother that my little brother tore one of the ligaments in his knee (the anterior cruciate ligament). The doctor thinks he should get surgery to repair it, since he's young enough that having a crummy knee would affect him. I'm looking at Wikipedia, and it says that surgery is painful and involves a lot of physical therapy afterward. Well, not having surgery involves lots of physical therapy as well.

My little brother already had broken his foot in gym class earlier in the year. He's not having good luck this year.

I think I'm going to draw him something. He's a big Tsubasa and Kingdom Hearts fan, so maybe some fanart will cheer him up a bit.

I can't believe I forgot to mention this, but I'm headed to Florida for Thanksgiving. Catch you all on Friday if my dad's condo doesn't have internet.*

* Knowing Dad? It just might -- the question would be if he has it activated for the week he's down there.

My father apparently just discovered the Evil Overlord List and, in an uncharacteristic display of forwarding, passed it on to me and half the family*. I wonder if I should tell him we passed that around when I was in high school (read: seven years ago), or leave it to Uncle Andy.

* Yes, at least half of the family would get a kick out of the Evil Overlord List. I come from a long line of geeks on my father's side. (Mom's side is also pretty weird, but not in a geeky way.)

So, my sister's wedidng went off without a hitch -- well, unless you count me mangling my finger three days before, three relatives that had to rush to the church due to plane delays, and a few other minor mishaps. Yay. Also, me forgetting to turn in paperwork before I left Ithaca.

Things are quiet here now. My cousin's band made it on TV -- apparently CBS's morning show was doing a Battle of the Bands, so the video they sent in made it. (You can vote for it on their website -- my cousin's band is Glint. I could probably also dig up their website, hint hint. ^_^)